Wednesday, July 28

calling all nerds

that's not an insult.  i promise.  see, i married a nerd.  therefore, i must love nerds.  and if i love nerds, and you are  nerd, then i must love you.
anyway.
i want to put my pic on my profile here in bloggerland, but have no idea what they mean when they ask for my photo url.  who is this url?  he must be dumb.  he mispelled his own name.  stupid url.  url has to die.  'lil dixie chick moment for ya.  oh wait.. are they still public outcasts since their humiliating moment of Bush-bashing? if so, and if it offends you that i apparently support them by merely mentioning them in my blog, well, then you are entirely too sensitive.
all that to say:
put my pic on my profile, please
peter piper picked a peck of pickled peppers
peter piper put my pic on my profile, please.
ha.
i just love a good tongue twister.
hope you enjoyed the randomness of this crazy blog.
time for spaghetti.
bye

Monday, July 26

just kidding

turns out the people living in the apartment i showed you in my last post decided not to move. so we had to go down yet again (our third day) to indy and spend a mind-frying several hours navigating those city streets until we found this. As of yesterday, Beechmill Apartments in Southern Indianapolis will be the new place of Zapf residence. it's really quite secluded and very beautiful. if you find yourself exploring the above link, we have the 2 bedroom, 1 1/2 bathroom floorplan with the living room extension. we're on the second floor (there are only two floors) and our balony looks out into some trees. and just beyond the trees, i have my very own jehovah's witness center. you wish you were so lucky. well, anyway, we're moving the third week in august, so if you're free... and have a big truck... just kidding. it doesn't matter what size your truck is. :-D wish i could tell you more, but the library closes at five and i still have bills to pay online. i was serious about the helping with the moving though.. it would be an excellent excuse to come see me!!

Friday, July 16

my response to nancy reagan

she has a plea.
have you heard it?
stem cell research could have saved her husband.
yes, nancy, your husband was a great man.
but he lived a full life.
is it worth it to steal a life from one
barely begun
with so many possibilities
yet unfound
to save another
who has already had his fill
on this world's joy and sorrow?

think on this.
what if the next baby you kill
had within his destiny
the cure

Thursday, July 15

i spoke with an angel today

she wanted laundry soap.

she wanted to know me.

she wanted to reassure me.

she gave me strength to hope in God.


there are times when i really really don't like working at the country inn.

then there are times like today. i was working housekeeping, and my boss wanted me to watch the desk for a bit. so i obeyed, like a faithful little servant-girl and was rewarded by the nicest stranger
coming and making conversation with me over the purchase of Tide.  then i saw her again in the hallway and she again stopped to talk with me, asking if i went to taylor. i explained i had graduated, and she asked what major (el.ed.) and where i was looking for jobs. that's when
the eternal torment of my undecided future came into the conversation. i explained how i didn't know the city where we would live six weeks from now. i explained how i didn't know if we could afford to live with josh in grad school. i guess, in general, i explained my frustration in the lack of control i had over my life. she stopped, looked at me, and said the most calming and reassuring thing she could have at that point in time. 'when i saw your smile, and observed your attitude, and heard you went to taylor, i know you were a Christian who was solid. this is a time you need to trust God. if you can get thru this time of trust and leaning on Him to direct your path, think of how you can use that experience to teach others, especially your students.' maybe it didn't go exactly like that, but that's the gist of it. nobody had ever told me that they knew i was a Christian from the way i acted, but it has always been a deep untold, and i suppose selfish and self-centered desire. nevertheless, when i heard it today, combined with her message of hope and faith, it was the right time and place. the rest of the day, my heart was filled with a peace i cannot explain. i felt a hope deep inside my chest that burned with an unquenchable fire.

that experience alone was enough to praise God for the rest of my life.


then i came home.

turns out God remembers birthdays.

(josh's was yesterday.)

he got a late present.

an assitantship!

we're going to indy!!!

:-D

Saturday, July 3

lost forever

i had a huge long updated post and was almost finished when... ie went poopy. grrrrrr. send error report?! i'll send an error report! right up your... er... nose.

now it's lost forever. nothing is ever done with the same gusto, expression, ferver, excitement, or manner as the first.

so i apologize, but this is going to be dull, dry, and boring.

first off. sorry i haven't been online for a month. i told you i can't be on my boss's computer, but recent developments have prohibited me from partaking in domestic internet experiences as well. our neighbors, with whom we have been sharing wireless internet, moved one apartment over, placing too much space and too many walls in between their antenae and our laptop. so we no longer get any service.

"so how am i online right now?" you ask? nevermind.

second off. josh didn't get a math assitantship at purdue in west lafayette. so if iupui gives us any help at all, we'll be in indianapolis for the next 4 years. i'm not sure i like that, to be brutally honest. i'm petrified of large cities. by the way, i found out the correct way to pronounce the name of that school. turns out it's oo-ee-poo-ee. not I-U-P-U-I. say it with me. oo-ee-poo-ee. that's right

what else did i have to say..?

oh, i'm leaving for michigan right after work today (after i pack, assuming josh hasn't done that... cuz he hasn't... cuz he's a boy.) we're going to be staying at the foso house in holland until monday. fun times! and i made cookies.*

uuuhhhmmmmm....
i got to play computer technician at work yesterday. i got paid to sit back here and search & destroy 222 spywares and adwares and 1 virus, thus increasing processing speed tenfold. then today, on the computer upfront, i installed more recent virus software (they had mcafee '96!) and solved 462 more viral issues. so far i've held every position here except manager. and i still haven't gotten a raise. that's right, front desk, common area/laundry housekeeper, real-honest-to-goodness-cleanin-rooms housekeeper, computer technician... honestly. i don't care if they do catch me on this stupid computer... they can't afford to loose such a valuable asset as myself.

well, it's time to end the shift.

sorry that was so dry, boring, and dull.

i have the hiccups.

josh just called - he's actually packing!!

beth

*don't use black pans when baking cookies. turns out 9 minutes burns cookies on black pans.

Monday, June 21

conglomeration: part 2

ok, so three weeks later...
lemme just say... spyware is of the devil. it put my computer out of commision. anyone who was talking to me in those final days of attempting to ignore the obvious hostile takeover surely foresaw the unfortunate outcome... you had plenty of time to mull it over anyway, in the half an hour it took me to complete one sentence on aim.

bethibaby22 signs on
bethibaby22: hey
bethibaby22 signs off
bethibaby22 signs on
bethibaby22: what's
bethibaby22 signs off
bethibaby22 signs on
bethibaby22: up
bethibaby22 signs off
bethibaby22 signs on
bethibaby22 throws computer out window
bethibaby22 signs off

but it's semi better now.

but back three weeks ago (before someone correct me, i know i'm exaggerating and i know i spelled that wrong, so don't bother)
anyway, back three weeks ago, i was talkin bout some every cloudy crap in reference to my future. i said that because i had just found out that josh might go to iupui (indiana university purdue university of indianapolis) instead of purdue in w. lafayette. and we were less than a day away from choosing an apartement in w. lafayette. we had it narrowed down to three, and then one came out with the huge sale where rent was lowered from $589 to $399. and it had wireless internet, it was only half a mile from campus, it had tons of recreational activities.. indoor pool... but that deal ended the day after we found out we might not even be in that town. so we didn't sign a lease.

it seems to always happen like that. just when i start planning my life and start to think i actually might have a grasp on my future, God's like, Hehe, just kiddin ya'll. don't know why i decided God would have a hick accent. but hey, if He created hicks (which we have to admit He did, despite attempts at denile), then the hick characteristic must reside within the hick Creator, right? and that was religious hick philosophy 101. one might then argue that evil exists, therefore God created evil, therefore God is evil... but who's to say God created evil, and who's to say evil isn't simply the lack of good? WHOA offtrack.

but at least i can say i actually grasped something from my 4 years of christian liberal arts education.

what was i talking about anyway...ahh yes... do not be anxious about anything but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your heats and your minds in Christ Jesus. trust in the Lord with all yourh eart and lean not on your own understanding. in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight. well, if every i needed the peace of God or the straightening of my paths, it would be now i guess. first one to tell me what two verses i quoted gets a free oreo. double stuffed.

so i need to apply for a job. i real job. with a real resume. and a real cover letter. i don't wanna. you know that feeling you get when you have a paper due in a month, and you know you should start it now but whenever you sit down at the computer, you stare at the monitor and the keys and your mind goes absolutely blank? well, that's what happens whenever i think of writing a cover letter. i can't brag on myself. and that's all a cover letter is. but then, a cover letter should also give the bossman an impression of who you really are as a person. so what if i'm not the braggin type of person? so the one part cancels out the other and i'm left with a blank monitor save the "to whom it may concern" at the top.

so! who wants to write a cover letter for me? anyone? anyone at all.

come on

i'll give you an oreo

double stuffed.

oh! funny story. i tried to spend my $2 bill. (i'm afraid only taylor grads will know the significance of this, if you bug me enough i might explain later). so anyway, i tried to spend my $2 bill. and it wasn't really of any dire importance, or even any importance at all. i was just really cravin an auntie anne's pretzel. and they're just over $2 and i had no other cash. they didn't take credit cards or checks. so i quickly weighed the decision in my head: give back to the alma mater which already took so much from me, i mean gave.. so much.. to me.. what the crap, i mean what i said. OR enjoy the salty buttery warm chewy wonder of an auntie anne's pretzel. hehe, so i decided on the pretzel. i carefully tore the yellow paper backing off and placed the bill on the counter. the girl (i'm guessing 16 yrs old?) realized what it was and looked quickly back and forth from the bill to me with extremely large eyes. i felt the heat rise to my face as i reached for the bill muttering something to the effect of 'oh, you don't take these either...' i started to turn away, when she said, 'no, that's not it, i .. i just.. you don't really want to spend that, do you?!' it took me a moment to realize what she meant. 'yeah, well, not, i ... i really want a pretzel!' again her glance went from me to the bill i had half-reached for. my hand loomed large in midair.. indecisive. 'oh, don't spend that! just take the pretzel, i won't charge you.' whoa, could it be? that $2 bill has indeed come in handy already! better than any scholarship i (n)ever received, i now was the proud owner of a free auntie anne's pretzel. i'm definately going back to that pretzel shop again. and i'm bringing my lucky $2 bill with me. even if they do take it.. i have at least 10 more at home just like it. i'm pullin this scam all over the country.

well, that's certainly enough for one night.

i'll have to write about my adventures in indy tomorrow. let's just keep you hanging with these carefully chosen suspenseful phrases:
1.) the road with five names
2.) passed out drunk
3.) non-existant I-65 N tomfoolery

enjoy!

beth

Sunday, June 13

Ugly Dress.com - Bridesmaid Dresses From [a very bad place]

Ugly Dress.com - Bridesmaid Dresses From [a very bad place]

enjoy hours of entertainment feeding off the embarrassment of unfortunate bridesmaids. pg-13 for language - they cuss a few times, sorry.

make sure you look at the shoes category as well... the maxipad slippers make it worth your while.

Wednesday, June 9

conglomeration

so here's my update:

while i was home in illinois, i spent way too much time shopping and bought no clothes at all. messed up, huh? hehe. we bought a car! we searched monday through friday and purchased a white 98 ford taurus se on saturday. it has everything i've ever dreamed of - four doors and a scan button (josh's car has two doors and neither a seek nor scan button - VERY annoying). it's in really good condition. we now have two cars, but i don't know for how long. the probe's alternator's acting up. we thought the ratiator AND the alternator were busted, and that's why we were searching for a new car. half-way through the week, we found that the problem was most likely the radiator hose which was leaking onto the alternator. $70 and 30 miles later, when the battery died, we realized there was probably more to the story. looks like the alternator needs new brushes. look at me, all car-smart. i never would have known before this vacation that alternators need brushes. apparently those are cheap to fix, and the car place would have only given us $500 for the probe, so we are now a 2 car family. the only problem is both those cars are fords...

on saturday, the day we bought the taurus (help me think of a cool name for it, 'taurus' isn't workin), my cousin jason got married! we actually had to go to the car place all dressed up for the wedding so we could make it on time (we were soooo almost late). it was my first catholic wedding. it wasn't as long as i thought (and was told) it would be. and it was really good, i'm assuming. i couldn't see well from our seats in the rear corner and i couldn't hear with all the echoing with the tall ceilings and everything. there were a ton of times when everyone else knew what to do or say, and i was left completely in the dark, being the protestant that i am, but oh well! gloria looked beautiful, as every bride always does. the reception was a blast, i got to meet family that i've actually never ever met before and hang out with family that i haven't seen in a long time. my cousin alison was all excited cuz i was finally 21 and not under a legally binding contract that controlled my beverage consumption habits. so she bought me a drink i can't even pronounce. it had lemonade in it - i can pronounce that much. i didn't realize i was supposed to stir it and took a sip off the top and WHOA was that stuff strong. i then proceeded to stir it and the taste improved significantly. it gave me a funny warm feeling in my belly :-D. but i didn't even get to finish it completely before josh was dragging me out the door. it was our last night in town and he wanted to see some more of his friends. so no, i did not get drunk. i didn't win the 50-50 either.

what else did i say i would talk about? oh. my 5k aspirations. and my 'ever cloudy'... something, oh yeah, future. i'll talk about the 5k. josh's sisters are running in a 5k on the 20th and they want me to run too. yeah, the last time i ran that distance, i was trying to get in shape for my wedding. so, i ran with them at the track to see what i could do, and yeah, definately pooped out after a mile and a half. that's only half of the 5k which is only 10 days away. so if there's anyone in town that wants to train with me, i mean seriously train with me... get in touch, otherwise i think this ain't happenin.

well, i'm fixin to be late to work, so i'll write about 'ever cloudy' crap tomorrow.

bye!

sheesh!

i guess i now know exactly how pathetic and bored... er.. i mean... caring and interested-in-my-life... my friends are. thanks for all those reminders that i hadn't updated my blog in two weeks. here are the reasons:

1) i went home to josh's house for a week and a half. the internet there is scarce and slow.
scarce=his dad's always on it
slow=dial-up

2) i had to sign a paper at work saying i would only use the internet for news-related and educational purposes. i tried to convince my boss that a blog is both (educating the public on the recent news of my life), but that didn't go over so well. and since i'm at work 40 hrs a week, that's a huge chunk of my free time.

3) i have to do full-time wifely duties. yeah, remember that blog lamenting the losses of college life? remember the part about missing (seemingly) free and pre-made meals? well, i'm livin it now folks. i have to go shopping for food and then cook the food. and then clean the dishes. all while simultaneously doing continuous loads of laundry.

anyways, that's my excuse. but tomorrow, i don't have to work til 3 (which means i don't cook!)so i'll be online most of the day i'm guessing. and i hereby solemnly vow to spend that precious free time educating you on the recent news of my life: my vacation, my new car, my aspirations of running the 5k, the new guy at work, my ever-cloudy understanding of exactly where i'll be two months from now... that should be enough to keep you on the edge of your sadly over-used and dilapitated computer chairs.

good night

Thursday, May 27

366 days

yesterday was josh and my one-year anniversary. i can't believe it's been a whole year of marriage already. it didn't seem wierd, or even special really. it just felt.. normal. in my defense, we did date for three years before we got married. although i know some have gone longer (*cough* tree...) for those who don't know me, tree is a person... not a plant.

after josh got off of work, we went to ft. wayne to celebrate. we ate at the olive garden, and for the first time, we were able to say, "yes!" to the free wine samples. she didn't even card us, just asked if we were old enough. but we ended up ordering raspberry lemonade (virgin).

after dinner, which i didn't really like mine by the way (only get the parmesian chicken if you really really really like strong parmesian) but that's ok because then the waitress took it off the bill (wow, they give you free alcohol and food too, if you don't like it!) we went and saw the movie, Troy. the movie was really good... with the small exception of the acting ability of one particular actor: brad pitt. maybe i'm being unfair, maybe i just have preconceived notions about him as an actor and therefore could not properly place him in the role he was playing. but during the movie, i kept getting distracted and pulled from the experience because it seemed brad pitt wasn't playing achilles, he was playing himself. he was playing Pouty-Faced Bad Boy Who Gets To Walk Around Naked And Sleep With All The Girls Cuz I'm So Hot. i know, i know... that's achilles! but! pitt didn't have the right persona for that age, i didn't think. he's just not one who transcends theatrical history very well. don't get me wrong, i like him as an actor - loved fight club - but this movie would have been better if they would have gone with talent over name. orlando was awesome. whoever played hector was unbelievable. sorry, i didn't stay for the credits to find out names of actors. the movie got out at 12:15, and i had to get up at 5:30 to go to work!

so, we came back to our humble little apartment, where paul was sleeping on the couch, and went straight to bed - we'll have to fulfill that stale-cake-tradition tonight.

we might have a cook-out tonight! if it doesn't rain and get everything all soggy. all the foso guys who are here for the summer will come, i believe. if you're in the area, stop on by! (don't know what time...) if you don't know where i live, then i probably don't know you, in which case, please don't come. if i do know you and you don't know where i live, then you'll know who to ask to find out, won't you? it's BYOM (bring your own meat) except i think joel's bringing a bunch of hamburger...

anyway, i should get to work. anytime one of the housekeepers walks by, they give me dirty looks cuz they're working and i'm NOT. :-D

remind me to talk about the new guy i had to train. that's a blog in itself.

bye!

Sunday, May 23

it is finished... it is beginning

i'm a college grad. i'm a taylor alumnus. alumni. alum. and to prove it, i'll show you the receipt for the $1 i already gave them as such.

the graduation ceremony was beautiful. you could tell a lot of prayer went into it. for example: it was the first day in two weeks where not only were there no storms, but there were blue skies! and a lot of sunburnt noses. every member of the class of 2004 now has the 'mark of the grad' - a v-shaped tanline on the forehead. except deborah moody, whose hat flew off while singing in chorale.

i didn't get to see melissa. i did get to hug lori. and we got a picture. ashley spent the night. paul's there as we speak. everyone else is gone. i'll get over it; i always do.

so far, being a college grad is fun. i've gotten a lot of money. that's always good. i've also gotten a lot of dessert. i got free cheesecake at the icehouse because the waitress misunderstood kasper's sarcastic remark on it being my birthday. but i accepted it, on the grounds that i felt college graduation was a better reason for free cheesecake than a birthday anyway. it could also be considered an early anniversary cheesecake. since our first anniversary is on wednesday. anyway, that night josh, paul, ashley, and i went out to applebees for desserts and drinks. yep, that's right folks. we were no longer under the ltc, and we were all over 21, and we designated a driver, and we ordered ourselves some drinks. nothing unlawful. nothing unbiblical. nothing unchristian. :) nothing you can do about it either. and today we went to ivanhoes and i got myself all fat on icecream. so.. the 'real world's' been pretty good to us so far.

so i just realized that i haven't been talking at all about our plans for the future. for those of you who don't talk to me on a regular basis... you have no clue. you also don't know that i have this smooth sultry voice thing going on because of the accumulation of kindergarten germs that culminated in a recent chest cold. i sound sexy.

you're right, flash.. i need attitude control...

anyway, my future! josh and i are going to purdue in the fall where he's working towards a graduate degree (he hasn't decided if he wants masters or doctorate) in electrical and computer engineering. i'm currently looking up job openings in the west lafayette area elementary schools. well, i'm trying to look them up. something always holds me back. i can't really look very long before i find myself at addictinggames.com or some similarly distracting site (such as blogger.com)instead. silly subconcience. subconscious. subconshus. don't you realize that your immaturity is costing me a finacially secure future?

ha! so i'm working at the hotel... and a guest who comes regularly just asked me whether i've put out my resume. he's holding me accountable! i'm glad God uses people like that in my life to keep me on track. isn't it funny? that He would use a complete stranger? the wonders never cease.

to continue on with the parts of our future that we do know, or are almost decided on, at least... we think we're going to live in married student housing. it's not the biggest. in fact, it's quite small. but it's cheap. and it's on campus, so josh won't have to walk (parking on campus is out of the question - you thought taylor was bad!). all utilities are included. we could even get high speed internet for $50/year. or maybe it was per semester. either way, that's pretty good. we would get a two bedroom... for the child--- i mean josh's office...

that's right. no kids. the plan is not until after grad school. sometimes i whimper and whine and demand a baby. other times i'm glad josh has the good sense to see that financially, emotionally, spiritually... we're not ready. but babies are so CUTE! :-D

well, that's all the future-planning that we've done at the point in time.

i'm going to go do something worth-while...

like read harry potter.

bye!

Friday, May 21

oh my

i'm forcing myself to sit and reflect on the ramifications of graduation. bear.. bare...bair with me.

graduation : beth as
1)candy : beth
2)freedom : prisoner
3)thunderstorm : small child
4)funeral : widow
5)sticker : kindergartner

this is it.

no more premade dinners at the dc. no more close friends less than 5 minutes away. no more early-morning-nights (we hope). no more excusable immaturity. no more papers. no more senseless reading. nowhere to go, whenever i feel like it, just to hang out with whoever i find there. no more christian bubble.

many more dishes to clean. many new faces. many hard decisions. much more faith in God. much more money. many more bills. many bad influences. much more required strenth. many new joys, yet undiscovered.

i hate being off-campus right now. this is my last day to spend with my best friends of the past three years. they're packing up, moving out, passing each other on the stairs, exchanging smiles and memories. i'm sitting on my couch crying because i'm missing my good-byes.

tomorrow, they all leave. who knows if i'll see them again before heaven. we all say to call and drop by. but when well i be passing through pennsylvania or florida. when will i be in the neighborhood of maryland that i could just drop by and see any of these people?

see you at the couch? not anymore.

4am conversations on relationships and life in general? not anymore.

senseless study sessions with no studying what-so-ever that left us so much closer after each one? not anymore.

complaining about anything and everything, just to hear ourselves talk? i'm still gonna do that. but with different people. i can only hope i can find them out there. i had everything just right. i liked where i was. i liked who i was with. i liked my life. a lot. now i have to start over.

help me God to find the strength in You.

Wednesday, May 19

tears of joy

congratulations, ashley and paul! yesterday, paul asked ashley to be his wife! the whole story is here: http://www.css.tayloru.edu/~apeck/wws/ read it; it's cute. i am so happy for them - they are the CUTEST.

sigh, to be young and engaged. the only milemarker i have left in my love life is kids, stretch marks, and fat thighs.

maybe i should talk about happier things...

seriously, i've noticed that my blogs tend to be pessimistic and sarcastic. that's funny because that's not who i am in real life. does it seem that way to anyone else? maybe this is my alter ego's chance to escape. maybe it's sick of the peppy cheery speak. and i can't realistically be sarcastic in a kindergarten classroom, so it doesn't get much escape. this must be my healthy, theraputic alternative.

did i use 'alter ego' correctly? it occurred to me that i'm not entirely sure of the meaning. that's what happens to one's mind when constantly surrounded by five-year-olds. and then going home to a nano-satellite-technology-obsessed husband who insists on explaining to me every detail on his new discoveries in attitude control (this is what keeps the satellite from careening out of control once in earth's orbit). oh wow... some of it's starting to sink in! so you see, my intellectual life is kinda unbalanced, which unbalances all other aspects of my life as well.

that's my excuse and i'm sticking to it.

wow, did i drift off-subject or what.

CONGRATULATIONS ASHLEY AND PAUL!!!!

Tuesday, May 18

two more days

i got observed for the last time. it was supposed to be informal, but she stayed allllll day and wrote it up and everything. liar. and of course, the weather was crazy, and i'm still feeling the effects of the night before last, so not only were the kids going berzerk (sp?), but i was too. but i comfort myself with this thought: two days left.

the port is out of my hands and off of my mind. it's done. when my classroom teacher was looking through it, i said, "if you find any spelling errors, don't tell me." that probably came off the wrong way, but i seriously didn't even want to look at those stupid ROY G. BIV painstakingly organized pages. yeah, that's right. i got this fancy pastel paper (because when you're el. ed., it has to sound smart AND look pretty... stupid combination, i know). and then i organized the papers so that they would go in ROY G. BIV order. i'm anal. i hate it.

oh, and the p.m. class finally got fifty pennies (i explained that in a previous blog, right?) so they get free recess tomorrow. yay. wait. i'm not even teaching tomorrow. crap. i work this long and hard and they finally acheive this goal... the day before Mrs. Friday takes over the class again. wonderful.... i love irony. well, at least i don't have to plan anything tonight. sigh. and thursday there's a sub, so i get to teach again, but it'll just be a fun day. i think maybe i'll have them make ME a shirt, since noah's was such a success.

so today, i guess, was my last day of real student teaching. let's all shed a tear...

Monday, May 17

but for the grace of God...

i wasn't able to post this on the 17th, but thanks to 'post options,' it looks like i did. tricked ya.

anyway, the reason i wasn't able to post this on the 17th... the 17th was a crazy day.

the port(folio) was due. so, being the intellegent person that i am, i stayed up until four a.m. to finish it. but wait.. i didn't finish it. i ran out of ink. oh yeah. so i stayed up til four a.m. to... not finish my port. that's right. do the math. i got two hours of sleep. then i went and taught two kindergarten classes. and during my lunch break, i went to wal-mart and bought more ink.

so i was tired, hungry, frustrated, and... oh yeah, CRAMPY. that's right boys, not cranKy... i was doubled over with horrible gut-wrenching pain. so i bought generic ibuprofen at wal-mart on my lunch break. and a diet pepsi.

so you would think that i would mark this day 'horrible' and file it as such, but no. the title is 'but for the grace of God' for a reason. i had a WONDERFUL day! the kids cooperated, were quiet, worked well together, listened... you name it! i wasn't even tired all day (don't know what was in that diet pepsi...) and i think i even found the miracle cure for cramps... generic ibuprofen and diet pepsi. must be the aspartame, but i have never taken anything that worked like that combination did.

in all honesty, today was a day when God was totally obvious in my life. i knew that nothing i was doing was myself. i was too sleep-deprived to have consciously done anything remotely intelligent. everything i did, every decision i made, even the attitudes of the children.. all God.

thank You.

Saturday, May 15

t-7 days

so, a week from today, i graduate from college. woah. (and i'm sure that comment is being echoed all throughout taylor as each member of the graduating class of 2004 comes to this realization, so i know i'm being very unoriginal). but still!

student teaching is going very well. i brought in a penny jar for each class, and a bag full of pennies. I told each class that whenever they did something responsible, respectful, fair, or trustworthy (the four pillars of character), they could get anywhere from one to ten pennies. when they earned fifty cents, they could buy a free recess. its awesome. now, whenever i want their attention, i can just rattle the penny jar. my voice has been saved.

we made noah's shirt the day before yesterday. it's unbelievably cool. (remember, i said that i'd make him a shirt cuz he ran the indy mini.) anyway, it says "i'm the best" on the front, and "hands down" on the back and is covered with little five-year-old handprints. cute and cheesy, just the way i likes it. and he wore it yesterday, to all his classes and then on a date with his girlfriend. awesome. the kids were so proud of their work, they were like, "your brother-in-law is gonna love this! this is sooo coool!" and they were right.

let's see, what else has been going on? my portfolio is halfway done. and it's due on monday, so depending on whether you look at that as half-full or half-empty, i'm either ok, or hopefully lost.

oh! we got to watch a house burn down yesterday at school. there was a really old rundown house actually on school grounds. it was a safety hazard, so they had to get rid of it. so they decided to burn it down. on a school day. wow, they're smart! actually, it was really cool because the kids got to go watch it and the firemen did this whole lesson on what do to if your house catches on fire. a much better learning experience than just watching a video, or listening to firemen speak at an assembly. then, they put the fire out and third through fifth graders got to tour the burnt house. they didn't let the kindergarteners go in. boo. then, after we all went back inside, they finished burning down the house. the pyro in me was satisfied.

well, if i don't stop writing this, you'll never get to read it. so i'm done.

beth

Tuesday, May 11

my comments are on vacation

so, inbetween the time when i set up this account and now, blogger decided, 'hey, we're missing a crucial part of the blogging experience - the comments!' so they changed EVERYTHING to be more user friendly, and added comments as an option. they also come up with sweet new templates. so, me being the change-aholic that i am, i wanted one of their sweet new templates. i also wanted their comment thing because it's, i dunno, easier for ppl? unfortunately, all that change was too much for my poor sickly comments. they have passed on, disappeared, gone on vacation. sadness. so now i need your help. go back and put your comments back on my blog. i hate looking and seeing no comments, it makes me feel rather unloved. and if you knew me at all, you would know that i can't handle that. so help put me at ease... put your comments back where they belong- bring them back from vacation. and ashley, i'll work on bringing your grandma back from vacation... and that chick. :-D

beth

unbelievable

PARTY AT MY HOUSE, I HAD A GOOD DAY!!!

i had my first good observation today. she said my shirt was too short. MY SHIRT WAS TOO SHORT! that was the best critisism she's given me thus far. and i have jamie larson to thank. she came over last night (she's kindergarten endorsement too) and watched my video with me and gave me ideas. actual, concrete ideas for classroom management! my prof has a PhD and she couldn't do that for me!! so i used one of those ideas, and guess what? I ROCK. why can't my prof see that that's what we need. we don't need theory. we don't need curriculum, really, either (just the standards crap). we need ideas, actual concrete ideas, for management. we need a bag o' tricks to pull from.

well, i'm glad i have friends who are supportive and resourceful. lori and jamie are the two people in the world who have brought me through this experience. thank you so much!!

i get observed next week too, but informally. she says she just wants to drop by to make sure everything's wrapping up ok. she needs to gather enough positive feedback. basically she says that previously i sucked and finally now she can write good stuff. oh well. i just hope she writes a lot of good stuff. it looks like i may pass student teaching after all. oh, and the port due date's been pushed to friday, possibly monday.

i'magonna go eat ice cream in celebration of my good day.

beth

Sunday, May 9

1 hr 50 minutes

this blog is dedicated to noah zapf who ran the indy mini marathon in 1 hr 50 minutes even with an inflamed tendon in his foot. noah, you're awesome. i hope you got a t-shirt for all your efforts. if you didn't, i'magonna make you one. no, that was not a typo, that was an italian accent. just for you. feel special.

sorry i can't write more about how awesome my brother-in-law is, but i've got stuff do to if i wanna graduate in two weeks (and i do!)

beth