Biiiiiiiiiiiig Baby, Big Baby, Big Baby

Oh yeah, Big Baby! (Big Baby #1, #1 Big Baby!)

I apologize. Only the Zapfs will laugh at that. But I had to put it in!

Benjamin had his two month appointment today and he is in the 90th percentile in all three categories! (Head, height, and weight). His head is 16", up 2" since birth. His height is 24 1/2", up 4 1/4" since birth. His weight is 13lb 10oz, up 6lb 13oz since birth! The doctor said it is very rare to have a baby be so perfectly proportionate. My big, perfect baby!

He also got three shots today. I suffered a minor broken heart. But we will survive.

Pictures to come! I just have to upload them online first, since Picasa refuses to work with me, as does the picture upload tool on Blogger. So it may be a few hours. I took lots of pictures this month.

Dear Anonymi

First of all, I haven't taken the time to make sure, but I think the Noah-flattering comment came from Michigan. :-)

Second, Anonymi (for that is the plural of anonymous, I'm pretty sure…), ya'll are making my head hurt. And yes, I'm breaking out the southern accent I earned when I spent the summer in Atlanta five years ago. Can you at least call yourselves Anon 1, Anon 2, etc? Also, I'm curious, do I know you? Are you keeping anonymous so that you can speak more freely because you are afraid our friendship might be affected? Or are you a guest to my site from some other means. I would like to know how many of my readers only know me through my blog.

Third, I've been wondering the same thing as Anonymous as to how Noah's interpretation applies to me and how I should respond. How have I been sinned against? Is forcing me to take down my clothesline (of which my lease says nothing) a sin? It would make my life a lot more inconvenient. Is making my life more inconvenient so that others can have their overly anal preferences concerning apartment "sightliness" catered to?

One thing is for sure. I have not been approached by any neighbor concerning my clothesline. I have not been approached by any management concerning my clothesline. A letter was left on my doorstep - a letter that was addressed, "Dear All Residents." And that letter did not clearly state that anyone was offended. "It has been brought to our attention that you have been hanging inappropriate items such as laundry." And that line alone makes it more a matter of rule-breaking than neighborly complaining. My husband and I were discussing this last night and were wondering – how do we show the love of Christ by non-resistance when we have yet to be approached? No one would see His example through our surrendering of our rights. So far everyone involved in this discussion (save "Theological Crap Guy") has at least agreed that the Matthew 5 passage should have the end effect of us showing love to our enemies. My "enemy" won't see the love of Christ because there was never a confrontation between us. Should I go to the office and ask if anyone was offended and if so, could I have their name so we could discuss this further? Or, since the correspondence concerning laundry seems to have dropped after my last letter, should I not press the issue?

We (my husband and I) also want to know, how far do you take Matthew 5? If an enemy asks for your child, do you say, "Sure, and take the other one, too!" And while I have had days where I would be tempted, it would break me completely to do this! What if an enemy asks for your kidney? Do you say, "Absolutely; take both! And the liver!" How far are we supposed to go to live out those words? And I'd like to hear from you not only theologically, but personally. How far would you go to live out Matthew 5?

As for my opinion on Noah vs. Joanna/Jeremy/Anon1, I honestly think you all have your points. I do believe that Jesus' overall message was to show love. But what I think Noah is getting at is very similar to Romans 12:20 which says, "On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." And this verse comes after many others which urge us not take revenge. So what I think Noah might be saying is not to seek the end result of "heap[ing] burning coals" on anyone's head, but that in walking the extra mile and giving all the clothes on your back, you cannot avoid the guilt that your enemy will feel in knowing they have robbed you and treated you wrongly. And that uneasy, guilty feeling you have given your enemy will hopefully be enough for them to realize they are not living as they should be (thus Noah's point on giving them the chance to make a choice to live right).

But how does this apply to my clothesline? There never was and most likely never will be a face-to-face confrontation where I could use Jesus' strategy of showing love to an overly anal neighbor (if there even is one) which would lead to the guilt that is necessary for change.

Put yourself in my shoes. You have no money for a dryer. You have four people dirtying clothes, towels, diapers (yes, we use cloth diapers), and more each and every day. If you hang the laundry inside, it takes 24 or more hours to dry, which restricts you to a mere one load a day, leading to a serious back-up – especially if you are, for whatever reason, unable to do a load one day. Not to mention if anyone spits up or has a diaper leak during naptime and sheets have to be washed as well! Hanging laundry inside also leads to other inconveniences such as toddlers taking socks off the rack and hiding them various places, and the missing half of our living room the racks take up. Hanging laundry outside dries faster, takes stains out of diapers, and gives us back our living room.

What would you do?

(And if this sounds disjointed, blame the toddler who was climbing on my lap and keyboard during the writing of this post!)

Matthew 5 on Laundry

My brother-in-law, Noah, has a very interesting response to Joanna's comment on Dear Anonymous. In that comment Joanna suggested that as a follower of Jesus Christ, I should be willing to turn the other cheek, walk the extra mile, and take down my unsightly laundry from where I am storing it on my balcony. So enjoy this twist on an old classic and let me know what you think!

A little background on Noah: He is a youth pastor from Ohio, so I think he deserves a little credibility on scripture interpretation.

Perhaps a little better understanding of the Matthew 5 passage is in order. To really understand what Jesus is trying to tell us, we need to know a little cultural background. When this was written, a slap on the face was meant to be degrading. It was something that a master would do to his slave, not to hurt him, but rather to say "I'm better than you." Also, the "slap" is most likely referring to a back hand slap. So, if you can visualize it, if someone backhand slaps you with their right hand, on your right cheek, and you then turn your other cheek to them, it is no longer possible for them to slap you again Or at the very least it would have to be a very awkward slap if you think about it. So really, by turning your cheek you're not inviting them to slap you again.but you are forcing them to make a decision. They can either punch you, or just walk away.and again, if you remember what a slap back then meant, most likely they will walk away because the original intent wasn't to hurt you, but to humiliate you.

Also, during the time of Jesus, typical clothing included a tunic and a robe. Other than that they were pretty much naked. So if someone tries to take your tunic, and you give them your cloak as well, you will then be naked. In our society, if we are naked, we feel shame, but during the time of Jesus, the one who saw someone else naked felt the shame because they were seeing what they shouldn't see. So really, instead of just giving up your cloak, you are pointing out to them the shame they are bringing upon themselves by their actions, and most likely, their response will be to not take anything from you.

Finally, during this time a Roman soldier could force a Jewish citizen to walk and carry their belongings for 1 mile, but no more. If you decide to walk with them an extra mile, they are the ones who begin to feel uneasy because if their superior officer sees them having you walk more than one mile with them, they could be disciplined and the result will probably be that they won't ever ask you to carry their belongings again for fear that you'll try to walk that extra mile with them again.

So I believe, when we understand all of that, Jesus isn't telling us that we need to be push-over Christians. What He is doing is showing us ways in which we can creatively stand up for ourselves in the face of injustices, without turning to violence or sin.

Dear Anonymous

Since there is a bit of a pause between the correspondence of the apartment management and myself (it's been busy - I haven't given them my latest letter yet), I decided to post my reply to an anonymous commenter from the last post. In order to fully understand this reply, please see his/her comment here.

And, Anonymous, please know that I did enjoy your comment and coming up with this post. If we all agreed with each other, the concept of blogs would never have gotten off the ground. So with that in mind, please don't take offense to the following:

Anonymous –

Thank you for adding some dimension to this little discussion. You've made my day, or at least my children's naptime, at little more interesting.

Yes, someone must have a problem with my laundry, be it a neighbor or management themselves. And yes, that is the origin of this whole ordeal. And yes, I might have lost sight of that amidst the fun I have had with my letters.

However...

I would like to think I have more of a right as to how I do my laundry than a passerby with overly strong opinions. And if they cannot prove to me that I signed a lease restricting my laundry rights, then I see no reason to stop.

I agree whole-heartedly with Jes and would like to you take a deep breath and realize that you own your lawn and your house. Your neighbors own theirs. You are responsible for yours; and they for theirs. You cannot make the whole world align with your preferences, so rather than to keep trying and end up with an ulcer, I'd like you to just let go, relax, and understand that others have their own lives, their own reasons, and their own preferences. One neighbor parking a company truck in his own driveway and another using his ingenuity to fix his own car in his own yard is no reason to be irritated. Yards were not invented to merely look pretty. They serve whatever purpose the owner of the land chooses for them. And believe it or not, driveways were invented to park cars, vans, and even company trucks.

So please don't be disturbed by my "blatant disregard for the feelings of [my] neighbors". I care for my neighbors and I respect their opinions. But I will not bend over backwards to satisfy them. I have my own preferences, too, you know. I would rather they not store propane tanks so close to me and my family. And I would prefer they not smoke so close to said propane tanks. Especially on windy days when their secondhand smoke flows downwind onto my balcony, into my apartment, and yes, even onto my freshly laundered clothes on the line.

Nuh Uh (In the Mature Voice of a 7th Grader)

May 11, 2007

Dear [Community Manager],

I appreciate the time you took to research those quotes from my lease. However, I must say that though I honestly do not want to be seen as difficult, I do not see how the points you laid out in your last letter apply to me.

Your first point, from The Good Neighbor Commitment, stated that I am not allowed to use my balcony for storage. Hanging laundry out to dry for a few hours hardly constitutes storage. I hope that if this truly is your concern, you have also addressed fellow residents that are keeping bikes and grills on their balcony. [Surely propane tanks are more hazardous than laundry.]*

Your second point, from my lease, informed me that I am to keep my balcony in a "clean and sanitary condition." I assure you; I am. I sweep the floorboards when bird seed accumulates from the birdfeeder on the balcony above mine. I do not let unused items sit on my balcony for long periods of time. I have even been known to Windex the sliding glass door from time to time. If you are concerned that the laundry I hang out to dry is not clean or sanitary, allow me to put your mind at ease – it is.

As for the laundry room in my apartment building, I did not mean to suggest I was unhappy with its location. It is conveniently close and I am grateful that you provide it. I thank you for addressing the unsatisfactory nature of the dryer and the cleanliness of the room so quickly and, in the future, I will notify you of such requests more promptly. Your swift attention to my needs is what makes this apartment so enjoyable for my family.

Thank you for your reconsideration.

Sincerely,

Elizabeth Zapf

* I so badly wanted to replace that sentence with this:

[On the matter of grills, I am sure you are familiar with the Indiana law that protects apartment residents from the dangers of propane tanks. It states that all propane tanks must be stored ten feet from the apartment complex. Surely you are addressing that matter separately, so I will get back to the topic at hand.]

But I was strong and I resisted. I need to withhold something for a Plan C, after all.

"Storing" My Dirty, Unsanitary Laundry on the Balcony

May 10, 2007

Dear Elizabeth Zapf,

Thank you for your letter regarding hanging laundry on your balcony. I appreciate that you took the time to respond.

Attached, please find copies of all applicable pages in your lease and addenda where it mentions balcony decor. On The Good Neighbor Commitment: "I will not use common areas or patios/balconies for storage." On your lease: pg 2, number 6, letter B: "Resident shall keep the Apartment Home, including all balconies, patios, and other areas reserved for Resident's private use, in a clean and sanitary condition."

In regards to your building's dryer not working, we have called for service on the dryer and Jetz laundry will be up to fix it within the next few days. As far as the placement of the washer/dryer provided, there is not another significant space in any building throughout the community where these can be located. Please feel free to use our community laundry facility located by the pool as it does have more light. I apologize that the light has been out and the floor has been dirty. Our maintenance team does the best they can for such a large community - so we appreciate it when residents let us know if they have a service request. We also have a cleaning team that comes through once a week to clean our community. We called them today and informed them that we have a resident complaints about the cleanliness of the laundry rooms. In the future, please call us if there is a service request or complaint.

Again, thank you for taking the time to respond to my notice. If you should have any other questions or concerns or would like to speak with me further, please call the office. Thanks!

Thank you for your continued residency!

[Community Manager]

Our "Unsightly" Attempts to Save Money

May 8, 2007

Dear [Community Manager],

I received your note concerning the "unsightly" appearance of my clothesline and I have a few questions, comments, and suggestions. Thank you for your time in considering the following.

First of all, while I appreciate and respect your aesthetic opinion of my balcony, I cannot find in my lease where my balcony décor is restricted. If you could show me where that is located I would gladly have a more in-depth conversation with you about what is and is not considered "unsightly". I do understand that nobody wants to see our socks. I have always taken pains to make sure larger objects such as towels or sheets are on the line closest to the courtyard so as to block the view of smaller more personal items.

Second, in response to the washer and dryer you have provided for my use, I have several comments and even some complaints. We live on a very tight budget where every penny counts. Spending $1.25 to dry a load of laundry would cost us over $60 every month. That is 6,000 more pennies that we can afford on a dryer. The ironic part is that even if we did spend the money on the provided dryer, the clothes would not be dry. Even after 60 minutes on the hottest cycle, they would still need to be hung out to finish drying. My biggest complaint about the provided washer and dryer, though, is actually the room in which they are kept. In my ten months of enjoying this apartment, I have never once seen that floor swept. It is the equivalent to an unkempt basement. In fact, the last time I went down there, the light bulb had burnt out and I had to operate in the dark. Most times when I visit the laundry room I have to take my toddler with me as she can not be left unattended. I have to make her either stand outside the laundry room or sit on top of the dryer to avoid her picking up something unsafe or simply becoming dirty from being in that room.

I recognize that there is an in-between option of hanging my clothes on drying racks inside my apartment. I have been doing this all winter, while eagerly anticipating the arrival of the spring sun for many reasons. Drying laundry outside decreases a drying time of over 24 hours down to 3 hours. The wind and sun soften the laundry. The sun bleaches out stains (and I have a toddler; I have stains!). But also, the drying racks take up a good portion of our living room. Hanging the laundry outside helps us appreciate our spacious floorplan.

Lastly, I have a question about the "hazard" you mentioned a clothesline could be in your note. My husband and I have tried and we cannot come up with an example to prove your point. If my clothesline is, indeed, a hazard, then we would like to work with you to come up with a solution that would allow us to safely continue to dry our clothes. I do not wish to put others or ourselves at risk – not even for softer, drier, cleaner laundry.

Thank you again for considering the above. I look forward to hearing a response from you.

Sincerely,

Elizabeth Zapf

Can Forwards Really Bring Down Gas Prices?

If you've gotten the forward that states boycotting all gas stations on May 15th will cost the oil companies $3 billion, then hopefully you scratched your head like I did and went, "Wait, no?".

This blog sums up my reaction perfectly. I don't know the author. I just googled "No gas on May 15th" and it was the first to come up. I especially liked the response of the 6th commentor. Let's all boycott Shell. They seem to be the most expensive around here, anyway.

What are your reactions to this forward? Do you plan on boycotting all gas stations on the 15th of May? Or do you plan on not driving at all on the 15th of May? What can we, the pitiful blue-collar working people of this country do to prevent gas prices from reaching $4/gallon (which I heard is in our near future)?

Again With the Downy Ball...

Yep. That's chex. Not any easier than popcorn to remove, either.